Until Angels Close My Eyes Read online

  “Well, pardon me,” her mother mocked icily. “I always expect to come home from a holiday and find my daughter and her boyfriend sleeping together.”

  “We were not sleeping together!” Leah stamped her foot. “We fell asleep in front of the TV watching movies.”

  Her mother rolled her eyes. “Oh, please, Leah. Give me some credit. You’ve been crazy about this boy for over a year. You spent a summer with him.” Her eyes grew wide, then narrowed. “Did he spend nights at your apartment? Did we fund your little love affair all summer long?”

  On the verge of tears, Leah cried, “How can you think such a thing? I’ve never slept with Ethan. Sure we’ve had the opportunity, but we never did. He respects me. He loves me.”

  “Loves you? What would a seventeen-year-old like you know about love?”

  Leah saw red. “I know lots about love, Mother. I know you don’t have to marry five times to find it.” Color drained from her mother’s face, but Leah didn’t back down. “I know that love is caring enough about a person to stick around when things get tough. I know that love is letting your daughter see her grandmother. And helping her keep in touch with her real father.”

  Where did all that come from? Leah wondered. She hadn’t meant to say those things. She’d meant only to tell her mother about her and Ethan.

  Her mother stiffened, but she kept her voice controlled when she spoke. “I’m not going to discuss ancient history with you, Leah. This is neither the time nor the place. I won’t allow you to distract me from the real situation—finding you and Ethan alone and unsupervised in this house.”

  Leah heard the subtle shift in her mother’s words. At least she was no longer flinging wild accusations. Leah swiped at the tears rolling down her cheeks. “I know how it must look, but nothing happened between me and Ethan. You’ve got to believe me.”

  “So you say. How can I believe you when the evidence is all over the floor?”

  “Don’t you think if we were sleeping together, we’d have tried to hide it from you? Not leave ourselves out in the open for you to trip over?”

  “I don’t know what to think.” Her mother rubbed her temples as if fighting off a headache.

  “Here’s what happened, from start to finish. Just listen.” Leah told her mother about the storm, the power outage, their watching TV and falling asleep. When she finished, she said, “That’s why we were on the floor. We just conked out.”

  “That explains the physical situation,” her mother said. “But it doesn’t tell me why he’s here in the first place.”

  “That’s going to take a little longer.” Leah sat on the sofa. Her legs ached from holding her body rigid. “He’s here because I invited him to stay with us for a while.”

  “Oh, Leah! How could you? Neil and I don’t need some teenage boy underfoot. Especially now.”

  “Just listen,” Leah said. “Please. I told him Neil could help him find his brother.” Leah patiently explained about Eli, the estrangement between Eli and Jacob, the terrible sense of loss Ethan felt over the death of his sister and the disappearance of his brother. “I know what it’s like to feel alone, Mom. I know what it feels like to want your family intact.”

  “Is that another slam about the way I raised you?”

  “No.” Leah sighed. “I’m just telling you what I felt growing up … about how much I wanted a family around me.”

  “I was your family,” her mother said sharply.

  “You worked.”

  “I had to put food on the table. I had to take care of us.”

  Leah was tempted to remind her mother again about her tendency to marry any man who came along. She thought better of it. At least her mother had calmed down and seemed to be listening to her. “Look, right now Ethan needs to get some things settled. I offered to help him. I don’t see how that’s going to interfere with your life.”

  “Dare I remind you that Neil’s recovering from cancer?”

  “Well, so am I,” Leah said. “And I know that having Ethan around is good for me. Why don’t I talk to Neil and tell him just what I’ve told you and let him decide about letting Ethan stay?” Leah felt confident that Neil would be more sympathetic than her mother.

  “I don’t want to burden Neil. He—He isn’t feeling all that good.”

  The news jolted Leah. “He’s sick?”

  A shadow crossed her mother’s face but quickly disappeared. “No, I’m sure he’s fine. But he’s tired all the time. He just hasn’t gotten his strength back from all that chemo yet.”

  Neil’s chemo had ended weeks ago. “He was feeling all right at Christmas and before your trip.”

  “It was probably just the trip,” her mother said dismissively. “We were very busy and went to parties with many of his old friends. He’s just overextended himself, I’m sure.”

  Leah stood, suddenly anxious to talk to Neil. “I’m going out to the barn.”

  “I’m not finished discussing this.”

  “I want to talk to Neil about it,” Leah said stubbornly.

  “Oh, all right.” Her mother sounded tired and cross. “But this isn’t over—not by a long shot. I’m going to unpack. And then there’s a meal to think about fixing.”

  “There’s some leftover stew in the fridge. I made it last night from one of Grandma Hall’s old recipes. She used to make it for me when I was little, before—” Leah broke off. “Well, anyway, I liked it a lot.”

  Leah started for the garage, where her coat and boots were.

  “Leah,” her mother said, “I know you have plenty of questions about the past.”

  Trust her mother to state the obvious. “You’re right. I do.”

  “Well, be careful. Don’t be so eager to dig around in the mud. You might not like what you find.”

  Without another word, Leah left the house.

  In the barn Leah found Ethan and Neil inspecting the cars. Several of the tarpaulins had been pulled back, exposing the fine old machines. Looking keenly interested, Ethan told Leah, “These are very beautiful.”

  “Not like Amish buggies, huh?”

  “Did you pacify your mother?” Neil asked.

  “For the moment.”

  “Ethan explained to me what happened.”

  Leah studied Neil’s face. He looked thinner. “Do you believe us? We weren’t doing anything wrong, Neil.”

  “I believe you both. And don’t be hard on your mother, Leah. She’s just concerned for you.”

  Leah said, “Mom and I have some things to work out. But it has nothing to do with you. I’m sorry about her crack about me not being your daughter.”

  “I know she didn’t mean it.”

  “Which is a big part of her problem. She often says things before she thinks. It hurts people’s feelings.”

  Neil gave Leah a sympathetic smile. “It’s a problem for most adults. Especially when they love their kids.”

  Leah didn’t feel like arguing the point. She stared hard at Neil, studying him for a long moment. “Mom said you haven’t been feeling great.”

  “A little tired,” Neil said. “Lingering effects of the chemo, I guess.”

  “It made me tired too, but once it was over, I snapped right back.”

  “You’re younger,” Neil said with a grin. “It takes a little longer these days.”

  “When do you see your doctor again?”

  “End of the month.”

  “Maybe you should—”

  “Oh, quit your worrying,” Neil patted Leah’s hand. “I’m fine. I just need a little rest.” He turned toward Ethan, who was listening intently to the conversation. “I know you didn’t come all this way for a New Year’s Eve party, Ethan. Why did you come home with Leah?”

  “I want to find my brother.”

  Ethan explained his situation; then Leah explained how she was hoping Neil could help him. “There’s no big rush,” she added. “And we’ll do all the work. But we don’t even know how to begin.”

  Neil looked thought
ful. “I’ll have to give it some thought myself.”

  “Not right this minute,” Leah said hastily. Neil looked exhausted. “I figured Ethan could stay in the basement, in the extra room down there.”

  “And I will work, sir,” Ethan said. “Anything you need done around your property. I’m a good worker. Plus, I’ll get another job to pay for my room and food.”

  “Oh, I don’t think that’ll be necessary.”

  Ethan shook his head. “No. I must work.”

  Neil nodded. “We can talk about it later. Don’t think I didn’t notice the clean walk when we drove up. You did a good job.”

  “Thank you,” Ethan said.

  “There are lots of little things around the house that need doing. I can do them, but … well, my energy level isn’t up to par.”

  “I will do whatever chores you want done.”

  “Keeping the cars up is important to me.”

  “All you must do is tell me how.”

  Neil smoothed his hand over the fender on the nearest car. “I’ll be glad to. Forgive an older man’s vice, but I love these big hunks of metal.”

  “I feel the same affection for my father’s horse and buggy.”

  Neil flashed Ethan a big grin. “Then we’re not so different after all. You’ve got a job, Ethan.”

  Leah watched the two of them shake hands and felt relieved. Ethan was staying.

  THIRTEEN

  Ethan moved into the basement area of Leah’s home, Leah returned to classes and schoolwork, and by the end of the first week, Ethan had proved himself nearly indispensable to the household. While Ethan still didn’t have a full-time job, Neil managed to keep him busy caring for his cars and doing minor repairs around the property.

  “That young man can fix anything,” Neil told Leah.

  “And he’ll eat anything, too,” Leah said. “He eats Mother’s cooking as if he actually likes it.”

  Neil chuckled but admonished. “She’s not that bad a cook.”

  Leah didn’t argue, but she looked forward to the nights when take-out food was on the menu.

  At school Leah settled back into classes, but as soon as the final bell rang, she headed straight for home—and Ethan. He had been with them only a couple of weeks when the two of them drove into town for a movie. They were in the ticket line when Sherry bumped into them.

  “Hi,” she said, giving Ethan a curious stare.

  Leah introduced them. “Want to sit with us?” she asked.

  “Love to,” Sherry said with a grateful smile.

  After the movie they went for hamburgers. The minute Ethan left the table to order more food, Sherry leaned toward Leah. “So this is the Amish boyfriend you used to mention?”

  “That’s right.”

  “And you talked your mother into letting him move in with you?”

  “It’s just for a while. Until he gets some things worked out.” Leah didn’t tell Sherry about the search for Ethan’s missing brother, only that Ethan had some family problems.

  Sherry leaned back in the booth and gave Leah an admiring look. “I’m totally impressed. Have you ever thought of politics as a career choice? I mean, if you can persuade your mom to let the guy you’re dating live with you, you must be some talker.”

  Leah laughed. “It wasn’t an easy sell, believe me. But Ethan’s so nice and he helps around the place so much, even my mother is beginning to depend on him.” She frowned. “Still, it would be good if he could get a real job. I know it’s starting to bother him that he isn’t giving Neil and Mom money for his keep.”

  Sherry stirred her milkshake with a straw. “Maybe my dad can use him.”

  “Really? What’s your dad do?”

  “He’s a veterinarian. He has a practice out on Mill Road. He takes care of farm animals—and house pets, too. I help out in the summers, but lately he’s been talking about getting someone to help him in the field. Birthing season is just beginning for the farmers. Since Ethan’s Amish, he probably knows a lot about animals.”

  Leah nodded enthusiastically. “He knows tons. Would you ask your dad about giving Ethan a job?”

  “Sure. And I’ll call you.”

  “That’s really nice of you, Sherry.”

  Sherry shrugged self-consciously. “It’s no big deal. You’re my friend. I’d like to help you out. And besides, Ethan’s nice. Not to mention totally gorgeous.”

  “I’ll tell him you said so.”

  Sherry shrieked and her face turned red. “Don’t you dare!”

  “ ‘Don’t you dare’ what?”

  Both girls started, then looked up to see Dave Simmons, who had appeared beside their booth.

  Leah stiffened, remembering their last encounter. “Private conversation,” she told him. “Don’t eavesdrop.”

  Dave held up his hands in mock surrender. “Well, excuse me. The princess has spoken. Let the world stop spinning.”

  Sherry sat mute as a post, her face reddening even more.

  “Leah? Is there a problem?” Ethan had come alongside the table. He set his food tray down.

  Dave turned, then gave Ethan a hostile gaze. “Who are you?”

  “Ethan Longacre.”

  Dave looked Ethan up and down. “You aren’t from around here. Where do you go to school?”

  “I do not go to school.”

  Leah’s heart thundered. She didn’t like Dave’s attitude. Ethan didn’t understand the threat Dave represented.

  Dave said to Leah, “I never figured you for falling for a dropout. Or is he just stupid?”

  “Get lost,” Leah told him.

  “I am Amish,” Ethan said, as if that would explain everything.

  Dave rolled his eyes. “Even worse.”

  Suddenly Sherry’s milk shake slopped across the table, landing on the front of Dave’s jeans.

  “Whoops!” she cried, looking horrified.

  The pale white glop rolled down his pant leg. Dave jumped back, swearing.

  Ethan stared at him. “You are rude,” he said to Dave. “And we do not want your company.”

  “Go away,” Leah said, “before I call the manager.”

  People’s heads turned in their direction and conversation fell off. Desperately Leah hoped Dave would notice and not cause any more of a scene.

  Dave glared menacingly, swore at Ethan and Leah and stalked off. He stopped, grabbed a handful of napkins and mopped his pants. He turned long enough to say, “Listen, Amish boy, if you know what’s good for you, you’ll stay out of my way.”

  Ethan turned his back on Dave. “He is not nice.”

  Leah’s hands were shaking. “He’s mean, Ethan. Don’t mess with him.”

  Ethan grinned. “He is like a dog locked behind a fence. He barks but has little courage.”

  Leah started to argue her point, but then she remembered Sherry. “You all right?” she asked.

  “Sure,” Sherry said, looking acutely embarrassed.

  Leah was fuming. “Dave’s a jerk. He shouldn’t have said those things. Good thing you had that accident.”

  “It wasn’t exactly an accident,” Sherry said with a sheepish grin.

  Leah returned her smile gleefully. “Good for you. Too bad you couldn’t have dumped it on his head.”

  “I will buy you another,” Ethan said.

  “No.… It’s okay. Really. I’ve lost my appetite.” Sherry stood and slipped on her coat. “I’ve got to be going anyway. Leah, I’ll call you after I talk to my dad. And Ethan, it was nice meeting you. I’m sorry Dave was so rude. We’re not all that way.”

  Leah and Ethan watched her leave. When they were alone, Ethan said, “I am sorry for your friend’s feelings. What is Dave’s problem?”

  “He doesn’t like you.”

  “He does not even know me.”

  Leah briefly explained how she kept turning down dates with Dave. “A guy like him thinks he’s God’s gift to the world. He can’t take no for an answer. Still, I’d have thought he would have gotten over i
t by now.”

  “His anger is foolish, but it does not bother me.”

  “It bothers me,” Leah said. “You be careful, Ethan. Stay far away from him.”

  “I do not fear him.”

  Leah knew it was the truth, but she feared for Ethan. In his heart he was still a plain person, but the world around him was different from his world in Nappanee. In her area, kids might not understand about the Amish. And they might not treat them with kindness. “Just be careful,” she said again, feeling the gulf between her and Ethan opening up once more.

  On Sunday evening, while Leah and Ethan were playing Monopoly, Neil came and sat down at the table. “Who’s winning?”

  “Ethan,” Leah grumbled. “He has the best luck. Look, he owns all the railroads, plus Boardwalk and Park Place.”

  Ethan’s blue eyes studied the Chance card he’d just drawn. “I have gotten an inheritance of five hundred dollars.”

  Leah groaned and counted out five Monopoly bills from the bank.

  “Let’s take a break,” Neil said. “I want to talk to you about finding this brother of yours.”

  Ethan leaned forward. “Yes.”

  “I’ve been giving it a lot of thought,” Neil said. “Tell me everything you know about him.”

  “I know nothing.”

  “Wait,” Leah interjected. “Didn’t you tell me you ran into one of his old teachers once? You told me she said Eli was finishing college and going to become a teacher.”

  Neil said, “Did he become a teacher?”

  “I do not know.”

  Neil considered the dilemma. Watching his face, Leah was again struck by how thin he looked. “I’ll call the Indiana State Board of Education and ask if there’s a teacher in the state named Eli Longacre,” Neil said.

  “And if there is not?”

  “Then I’ll contact teaching organizations in surrounding states. If that turns up nothing, we’ll try national groups.”

  “But what if he is not a teacher?”

  “There are other ways of finding people,” Neil said. He found a yellow pad of paper in a desk drawer. “Right now, I want you to tell me everything you can remember about your brother.” He took notes while Ethan answered his questions. Once he was satisfied, he said, “I won’t give up, Ethan. We’ll find out something about Eli.”